"Changes to your chosen field are indicated, Cancer. Ideas from other states or countries might fire your creativity. Your intellectual or artistic interests could take on a new dimension, expanding your horizons and opening new opportunities. You might toy with the idea of travel, perhaps to learn more about these matters. Possible formal education in new fields is also indicated."
This is everything I have been thinking, feeling, dreaming and wanting...
A few weeks ago someone said to me that perhaps we have the ability to think something and to some extent have others react in a manner accordingly with what we are thinking. Obviously it is not mind control, but I don't rule out cosmic forces! It is most likely a manner of perfecting the art of persuasion. Well folks... the above horoscope has been on my mind for weeks if not months... and there it is in print starring me right in the face. I love it when I am smacked in the head with a sign. Sure makes the decision process much easier. Thank you cosmic forces.
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Refrigerator Analogy
Last year, around this time I went on a rant about "fridge shopping". I seriously put so much thought and effort into this purchase and how it really affected me and was such a big decision. I managed to turn the analogy into a reflection of my own life and how I needed certain features in a fridge, as well as in a man (and yes I do realize I need a life!).
BOY HAS A YEAR CHANGED ALL THAT! That poor fridge served me well for 12 months, and now sits lonely in my garage awaiting my posting of a craisglist add to sell it. In its place sits a new, tiny white fridge... bare bones basic with zero bells and whistles! You see, I've spent the past several weeks... heck months simplifying my life. I've "lightened my load" in so many ways, and in the interim, stopped blogging. So I guess it is time I play catch up.
March - I went to France... That will be a several posts to share... (honestly I cannot believe looking back I have not shared ANYTHING about my trip to Paris.)
April - Got my real estate license finalized. Offered a new job (again, needs elaborating)
May - Simplified my flippin' life! Moved 40 miles away from my ex (woohoo!) Started a new job and downsized into a tiny 2 bedroom apartment. Which leads me now to this blog and why my "recipe"fridge sits in the garage!
I have spent the past several years letting go, and I mean that in so many ways... emotionally, physically, mentally, and financially. I walked away from my tattered marriage of 9 years and left the house I built with pretty much everything in it. What I did manage to take with me I've held on to for the passed two years while moving twice. Both of those times I continued to live in the same neighborhood as my original home which made the moves convenient (if that is even possible). I also managed to live in houses less than 6 years old, that also had all of the modern amenities I had become accustomed to. This time, when my lease came up for renewal I knew I was GONE. I headed to the beach, actually the city I grew up in and couldn't be happier about my decision. I'm not going to lie, going from 3500 sqft, down to 1700 sqft different, but not difficult... BUT going from 1700 to 900 sqft was tough! I donated as much as I could, and have gotten extremely efficient with small spaces. My old fridge measured to fit perfectly in the new kitchen, only problem was I couldn't get it around a corner to get it to the kitchen! I went from last year having to have all of these key features in a fridge... to just having one that fits and runs! Thank you Sears for tiny fridges. I guess its a good thing for me to have had to go through... as I put it last year... all of the ingredients I needed for my recipe in a fridge mirrored my thoughts on relationships... and in keeping with my life trends... maybe I should simplify my thoughts of dating and men... and go with a basic model!
Ironic but my horoscope for today is:
"Why do you insist on looking back at what cannot be changed? Do you enjoy it? Is there a masochistic streak in your nature? Whatever the reason, it's time to get over the past. It's the future that matters.
BOY HAS A YEAR CHANGED ALL THAT! That poor fridge served me well for 12 months, and now sits lonely in my garage awaiting my posting of a craisglist add to sell it. In its place sits a new, tiny white fridge... bare bones basic with zero bells and whistles! You see, I've spent the past several weeks... heck months simplifying my life. I've "lightened my load" in so many ways, and in the interim, stopped blogging. So I guess it is time I play catch up.
March - I went to France... That will be a several posts to share... (honestly I cannot believe looking back I have not shared ANYTHING about my trip to Paris.)
April - Got my real estate license finalized. Offered a new job (again, needs elaborating)
May - Simplified my flippin' life! Moved 40 miles away from my ex (woohoo!) Started a new job and downsized into a tiny 2 bedroom apartment. Which leads me now to this blog and why my "recipe"fridge sits in the garage!
I have spent the past several years letting go, and I mean that in so many ways... emotionally, physically, mentally, and financially. I walked away from my tattered marriage of 9 years and left the house I built with pretty much everything in it. What I did manage to take with me I've held on to for the passed two years while moving twice. Both of those times I continued to live in the same neighborhood as my original home which made the moves convenient (if that is even possible). I also managed to live in houses less than 6 years old, that also had all of the modern amenities I had become accustomed to. This time, when my lease came up for renewal I knew I was GONE. I headed to the beach, actually the city I grew up in and couldn't be happier about my decision. I'm not going to lie, going from 3500 sqft, down to 1700 sqft different, but not difficult... BUT going from 1700 to 900 sqft was tough! I donated as much as I could, and have gotten extremely efficient with small spaces. My old fridge measured to fit perfectly in the new kitchen, only problem was I couldn't get it around a corner to get it to the kitchen! I went from last year having to have all of these key features in a fridge... to just having one that fits and runs! Thank you Sears for tiny fridges. I guess its a good thing for me to have had to go through... as I put it last year... all of the ingredients I needed for my recipe in a fridge mirrored my thoughts on relationships... and in keeping with my life trends... maybe I should simplify my thoughts of dating and men... and go with a basic model!
Ironic but my horoscope for today is:
"Why do you insist on looking back at what cannot be changed? Do you enjoy it? Is there a masochistic streak in your nature? Whatever the reason, it's time to get over the past. It's the future that matters.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Chapter
A few years ago I shared a conversation with a dear friend about life being a book. As we went along, we joked about the beginning of the book, and made up scenes and scenarios for the chapters that followed. At that stage in my life, my book looked more as if it were a romance novel. You know the one.... boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love, live happily ever after, and at the end of their lives are showered with love and adoration by their children and grandchildren. While that book obviously has been shelved as in "never to be published", my current book is lacking. It's past time I start writing my next novel.
Obviously I have been working on my outline for the past few months. I am in the final stages of having two amazing careers take off. However, I still need a location... which I am working on oh and don't to forget a "romantic interest"!
More to come...
Obviously I have been working on my outline for the past few months. I am in the final stages of having two amazing careers take off. However, I still need a location... which I am working on oh and don't to forget a "romantic interest"!
More to come...
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Whats happening...
I've been down lately; I wouldn’t go so far as to say I am depressed, but lacking my perk. Usually the best thing for me to do when I get this way is write in my blog and take a moment to reflect and be grateful again, and yet my blog is the one thing I have been avoiding the most. I’ve been struggling for weeks to form words and sentences. There have been countless attempts sitting at my laptop starring at its glowing screen… and nothing, so in traditional Amber fashion, here goes... my therapy.
February is a hard month for me, career wise and personally. Each year my business attends it’s largest trade show which I handle everything in addition to attending (not by choice of course!) Also, it has now been two years since my father passed and a day doesn't go by without a thought or memory of him. I hate to say it but mentally I was in a better place last year than I am now. Not to mention the commercial holiday of “love, lovers and romance”, thank goodness this month is short!
There are so many incredible opportunities happening in my life right now, and yet I have become impatient to the amount of time they will take. I am a few weeks away from my state exams for my realtors license (I would have taken it this week if it wasn't for my trade show) My dearest Jeff is doing his part to get his new office in place and piece together his dream team, which I am included in. This is a new venture for me, and one I believe I will succeed at. I am still in the early stages of the music licensing position. I find this to be an extremely exciting opportunity, however it is equally competitive and I am most definitely the new kid on the block. For now I am creating relationships and have just started to get our music out there. Little by little I am becoming more familiar with the independent Music Supervisors and the different music library companies. As the end of my second month nears I am anxious to see results. I want nothing more than to succeed at this for multiple reasons. In fact I have found an incredible course at UCLA for this exact career and REALLY am contemplating enrolling.
I just spent the last four days in Indianapolis, my annual tradeshow in the motorsports industry. I am currently sitting on my flight home reflecting. I arrived on Tuesday (Valentine’s Day) and was scheduled to return the following Monday. I couldn’t do it. I wasn’t up for the mingling, the men, and the parties, none of it. It’s Saturday and I’m almost home, and can’t wait to get there. This year I didn’t have it in me. I got there, got the booth built in record time, had a day and a half to myself before my crew arrived, and I was done…over it. I spent 5 hours one day at the spa which was the highlight of my trip. I managed one night out with a group and had a great time (including sunglass guy…forgot what I call him or if I ever gave him a nickname?) but after that I was over it. I attended day one of the show, made sure my two new salesmen could handle it and headed out midday today. I am not myself… not to mention I want nothing to do with this industry and portion of my past life. The drive is gone and it shows.
Lets see what else can I get out of my head… I’ve started therapy with Kayden, a little for her and a lot for me. Lately we have been having numerous issues at home. She “acts” as though she doesn’t care about school and her studies; homework time has become a battle zone. I’ve had to give up going to the gym because our nighttime routine is impossible. It’s worried me for months and a few weeks ago while my mom was in town for Kayden’s birthday and saw first hand our ”situation”, I knew it was time to address it. Apparently my little girl is feeding off me… no surprise… and since I am sort of a mess right now we both are falling apart. The poor thing has guilt towards me and my lack of happiness. She is older now and is starting to understand and feel the effects of the divorce. She sees our “old” life when she stays with her dad and his girlfriend. She sees how dad has someone and mom is alone. It has put unnecessary pressure on her being that she thinks she is all I’ve got. Poor thing. So now my 8 year old is acting out the only (toxic) relationship she has ever seen me in… it’s the only way she knows. How sad is that. So we have weekly sessions each alone and occasionally together. As much as I tried to do the right thing these past two years by keeping her close to her father, staying in the same neighborhood and trying not disrupt her world, my happiness deteriorated, and I didn’t create a new life for me. This is causing us both pain. So now, more than ever, I need to move away, get happy, and start living. The current plan when my lease is up in April is to move home… as in with my parents. Take a few months to focus on myself and my daughters’ well being and be surrounded by a healthy, loving environment. Then head towards the beach and start living! Basically I am taking 4-6 months to rest and take my time with our next move. The goal is to spend the summer at the ranch and be back south by the time school starts. I will obviously commute a little bit between the city and the ranch so that Kayden can see her dad and I can handle any work requirements. I am getting excited about the idea and reality of a real change. I have spent the past two years going through the motions and getting nowhere... it's time my wheels actually take me somewhere!
February is a hard month for me, career wise and personally. Each year my business attends it’s largest trade show which I handle everything in addition to attending (not by choice of course!) Also, it has now been two years since my father passed and a day doesn't go by without a thought or memory of him. I hate to say it but mentally I was in a better place last year than I am now. Not to mention the commercial holiday of “love, lovers and romance”, thank goodness this month is short!
There are so many incredible opportunities happening in my life right now, and yet I have become impatient to the amount of time they will take. I am a few weeks away from my state exams for my realtors license (I would have taken it this week if it wasn't for my trade show) My dearest Jeff is doing his part to get his new office in place and piece together his dream team, which I am included in. This is a new venture for me, and one I believe I will succeed at. I am still in the early stages of the music licensing position. I find this to be an extremely exciting opportunity, however it is equally competitive and I am most definitely the new kid on the block. For now I am creating relationships and have just started to get our music out there. Little by little I am becoming more familiar with the independent Music Supervisors and the different music library companies. As the end of my second month nears I am anxious to see results. I want nothing more than to succeed at this for multiple reasons. In fact I have found an incredible course at UCLA for this exact career and REALLY am contemplating enrolling.
I just spent the last four days in Indianapolis, my annual tradeshow in the motorsports industry. I am currently sitting on my flight home reflecting. I arrived on Tuesday (Valentine’s Day) and was scheduled to return the following Monday. I couldn’t do it. I wasn’t up for the mingling, the men, and the parties, none of it. It’s Saturday and I’m almost home, and can’t wait to get there. This year I didn’t have it in me. I got there, got the booth built in record time, had a day and a half to myself before my crew arrived, and I was done…over it. I spent 5 hours one day at the spa which was the highlight of my trip. I managed one night out with a group and had a great time (including sunglass guy…forgot what I call him or if I ever gave him a nickname?) but after that I was over it. I attended day one of the show, made sure my two new salesmen could handle it and headed out midday today. I am not myself… not to mention I want nothing to do with this industry and portion of my past life. The drive is gone and it shows.
Lets see what else can I get out of my head… I’ve started therapy with Kayden, a little for her and a lot for me. Lately we have been having numerous issues at home. She “acts” as though she doesn’t care about school and her studies; homework time has become a battle zone. I’ve had to give up going to the gym because our nighttime routine is impossible. It’s worried me for months and a few weeks ago while my mom was in town for Kayden’s birthday and saw first hand our ”situation”, I knew it was time to address it. Apparently my little girl is feeding off me… no surprise… and since I am sort of a mess right now we both are falling apart. The poor thing has guilt towards me and my lack of happiness. She is older now and is starting to understand and feel the effects of the divorce. She sees our “old” life when she stays with her dad and his girlfriend. She sees how dad has someone and mom is alone. It has put unnecessary pressure on her being that she thinks she is all I’ve got. Poor thing. So now my 8 year old is acting out the only (toxic) relationship she has ever seen me in… it’s the only way she knows. How sad is that. So we have weekly sessions each alone and occasionally together. As much as I tried to do the right thing these past two years by keeping her close to her father, staying in the same neighborhood and trying not disrupt her world, my happiness deteriorated, and I didn’t create a new life for me. This is causing us both pain. So now, more than ever, I need to move away, get happy, and start living. The current plan when my lease is up in April is to move home… as in with my parents. Take a few months to focus on myself and my daughters’ well being and be surrounded by a healthy, loving environment. Then head towards the beach and start living! Basically I am taking 4-6 months to rest and take my time with our next move. The goal is to spend the summer at the ranch and be back south by the time school starts. I will obviously commute a little bit between the city and the ranch so that Kayden can see her dad and I can handle any work requirements. I am getting excited about the idea and reality of a real change. I have spent the past two years going through the motions and getting nowhere... it's time my wheels actually take me somewhere!
Saturday, January 21, 2012
The truth... the whole truth... and nothing but
The truth... crap... I still have not written a real blog (thanks Kelly for calling me out on it!) I am in denial of whats really going on in my life right now, and by me writing about it I have to face it. **crinkles my nose** Here goes....
I managed to get through December and the holidays fairly unscathed. It was my first Christmas without my daughter.. and sister.. and brother for that matter. Since it had become so foreign to not only me, but my parents as well, we decided it was best to do something we have never done before, that way we wouldn't all three pout! We celebrated Christmas a day early and at my house. My parents actually came and stayed with me for 5 days.. and yes folks that's a record! We were social to say the least... we had dinner with friends every night! We celebrated Christmas Eve on Friday and had our Christmas morning on Saturday, in order to share our traditions with Kayden. Then we shipped her off to her dads and that was that.
New Year's was less eventful. I had every intention of going somewhere... OUT of town and doing something... Needless to say it was another New Years Eve with no one to kiss... well except my beautiful daughter. This year, hopefully that will change, but I am not putting any pressure on me!
I have been so busy the last six months since I have taken dating out of my equation. My intentions were to get prepped and prepared for the changes I expect to happen in 2012. and mentally I am getting there. To be honest I put too much focus in 2010 and 11 on dating and finding my perfect recipe, almost to the point of me looking desperate... and guess what... I'm not! I am alone, but not lonely... well not all of the time! I've stopped looking and have found plenty to keep me busy. Hopefully at some point this year I will get back to working on that and experiencing love again. I do have so much to share and would love the right someone to share it with. But for now I am focusing on moving OUT of my current area and creating my next life.
Why am I so focused on moving... I keep getting people asking me this question. Well for one... I moved to this town when I was young and houses were cheap! I made a great profit on my first property and somehow managed to bankroll that into the next. This is a lovely area for families... this town wreaks of soccer moms! While I am an extremely involved parent in my daughters life... from tennis club... to classroom reading groups... to running club... I am there... but I am NOT a soccer mom! I am the "divorced" mom... and mind you the only one in the second grade! This area is for families and I no longer fit the mold. On any given weekend night at the local bars and restaurants there are NO possible suitors! That is of course unless I was interested in a 20 something year old guy who drives a big lifted truck, wears his black flat billed hat with his black socks and shoes! Uh... "she said NO"! The professional grown men here are all married. And not that I am all about trolling the bars... because those of you that know me... know I obviously have NO game and that's NOT me! I am interested in socializing with my peers... other single women.. and adult professional men! Not to mention running into the home wrecker girlfriend in the toothpaste aisle at the market and now at the gym is getting old! Time for me to relocate. My plan by summertime is to be back in the OC... I'd love the beach but not sure whats in the budget, so most likely back to Costa Mesa.... which is peachy with me! I loved spending last summer down there with Mr. D and remembered how active people are and how the local economy encourages it!
What's been keeping me busy... I did manage to finish real estate school, and have applied for the state licensing exam. I am awaiting my test date in the next few weeks. I have a new set that I am working on, a short film about jazz legends Miles Davis and John Coltrane. I am very interested in this one as we are filming them recording a legendary album and its all about the music. The prop house excursion alone was an adventure in itself! Have I mentioned my latest career adventure. This one I am extremely excited about... in fact it could become my dream job, that is of course if it becomes profitable for me! This one requires it's own paragraph along with some explanations!
I have a dear friend who contacted me the later part of December with a proposition. Earlier last year he purchased a portion of a record label. As it is moving into it's second year of business, the goal of the label is to open a licensing division to generate more revenue through music placement in all media forms. My friend was kind enough to offer me the position of running this division. He knows I am an avid music fan, he also knows of my desires to leave my current company, and I happen to be local to the area of the industry. How perfect could this be... right! Me selling music...hello... I have slung enough boy toys to last me to eternity and have absolutely no passion nor knowledge of that industry... but me and MUSIC... that stuff runs through my veins! There is only one catch... Mr. P owns the label. I know, I know, I know.... if you've read in any length this blog then you obviously know who that is and can only imagine what it's doing to me. I am praying I become so sick of hearing his voice and seeing his face that I can finally get the damn closure I needed to get over him! But who am I kidding! All joking aside it has been pretty easy thus far... the Mr. P part I mean. For the most part it's all work as we both have desires of making a shit ton of money! The job stuff is just getting underway. I am in the process of making connections with several media outlets from music supervisors to agencies that supply music. There is the occasional banter from Mr. P, I think he feels the need to boost my morale, not sure why?!? It will be nice years down the road to look back at all of this and say... "remember when", shake our heads and laugh... but for now, no one has come remotely close to filling shoes... and since I've put "that" on hold it is apparent. Anyhow enough about Mr. P... I am ecstatic about the opportunity... and pray that it becomes a full time career... it is something I would have never imagined but am loving it
So there you have it... (Kelly)! It's 2012, I am still single... (cant believe you asked that one).... still living "here".... and still working "there"....
BUT... it's a new year .... and my slate is clean! Time to get it dirty :-)
I managed to get through December and the holidays fairly unscathed. It was my first Christmas without my daughter.. and sister.. and brother for that matter. Since it had become so foreign to not only me, but my parents as well, we decided it was best to do something we have never done before, that way we wouldn't all three pout! We celebrated Christmas a day early and at my house. My parents actually came and stayed with me for 5 days.. and yes folks that's a record! We were social to say the least... we had dinner with friends every night! We celebrated Christmas Eve on Friday and had our Christmas morning on Saturday, in order to share our traditions with Kayden. Then we shipped her off to her dads and that was that.
New Year's was less eventful. I had every intention of going somewhere... OUT of town and doing something... Needless to say it was another New Years Eve with no one to kiss... well except my beautiful daughter. This year, hopefully that will change, but I am not putting any pressure on me!
I have been so busy the last six months since I have taken dating out of my equation. My intentions were to get prepped and prepared for the changes I expect to happen in 2012. and mentally I am getting there. To be honest I put too much focus in 2010 and 11 on dating and finding my perfect recipe, almost to the point of me looking desperate... and guess what... I'm not! I am alone, but not lonely... well not all of the time! I've stopped looking and have found plenty to keep me busy. Hopefully at some point this year I will get back to working on that and experiencing love again. I do have so much to share and would love the right someone to share it with. But for now I am focusing on moving OUT of my current area and creating my next life.
Why am I so focused on moving... I keep getting people asking me this question. Well for one... I moved to this town when I was young and houses were cheap! I made a great profit on my first property and somehow managed to bankroll that into the next. This is a lovely area for families... this town wreaks of soccer moms! While I am an extremely involved parent in my daughters life... from tennis club... to classroom reading groups... to running club... I am there... but I am NOT a soccer mom! I am the "divorced" mom... and mind you the only one in the second grade! This area is for families and I no longer fit the mold. On any given weekend night at the local bars and restaurants there are NO possible suitors! That is of course unless I was interested in a 20 something year old guy who drives a big lifted truck, wears his black flat billed hat with his black socks and shoes! Uh... "she said NO"! The professional grown men here are all married. And not that I am all about trolling the bars... because those of you that know me... know I obviously have NO game and that's NOT me! I am interested in socializing with my peers... other single women.. and adult professional men! Not to mention running into the home wrecker girlfriend in the toothpaste aisle at the market and now at the gym is getting old! Time for me to relocate. My plan by summertime is to be back in the OC... I'd love the beach but not sure whats in the budget, so most likely back to Costa Mesa.... which is peachy with me! I loved spending last summer down there with Mr. D and remembered how active people are and how the local economy encourages it!
What's been keeping me busy... I did manage to finish real estate school, and have applied for the state licensing exam. I am awaiting my test date in the next few weeks. I have a new set that I am working on, a short film about jazz legends Miles Davis and John Coltrane. I am very interested in this one as we are filming them recording a legendary album and its all about the music. The prop house excursion alone was an adventure in itself! Have I mentioned my latest career adventure. This one I am extremely excited about... in fact it could become my dream job, that is of course if it becomes profitable for me! This one requires it's own paragraph along with some explanations!
I have a dear friend who contacted me the later part of December with a proposition. Earlier last year he purchased a portion of a record label. As it is moving into it's second year of business, the goal of the label is to open a licensing division to generate more revenue through music placement in all media forms. My friend was kind enough to offer me the position of running this division. He knows I am an avid music fan, he also knows of my desires to leave my current company, and I happen to be local to the area of the industry. How perfect could this be... right! Me selling music...hello... I have slung enough boy toys to last me to eternity and have absolutely no passion nor knowledge of that industry... but me and MUSIC... that stuff runs through my veins! There is only one catch... Mr. P owns the label. I know, I know, I know.... if you've read in any length this blog then you obviously know who that is and can only imagine what it's doing to me. I am praying I become so sick of hearing his voice and seeing his face that I can finally get the damn closure I needed to get over him! But who am I kidding! All joking aside it has been pretty easy thus far... the Mr. P part I mean. For the most part it's all work as we both have desires of making a shit ton of money! The job stuff is just getting underway. I am in the process of making connections with several media outlets from music supervisors to agencies that supply music. There is the occasional banter from Mr. P, I think he feels the need to boost my morale, not sure why?!? It will be nice years down the road to look back at all of this and say... "remember when", shake our heads and laugh... but for now, no one has come remotely close to filling shoes... and since I've put "that" on hold it is apparent. Anyhow enough about Mr. P... I am ecstatic about the opportunity... and pray that it becomes a full time career... it is something I would have never imagined but am loving it
So there you have it... (Kelly)! It's 2012, I am still single... (cant believe you asked that one).... still living "here".... and still working "there"....
BUT... it's a new year .... and my slate is clean! Time to get it dirty :-)
Friday, January 20, 2012
Say Cheese...
Apparently my smiles have been a little lack luster the past few weeks... so I dug up some photos proving I am still having a good time! The one on the left was two weeks ago when I went sailing for the first time. It was an incredible day off the coast of Newport Beach. I sat on the bow of the boat with my feet dangling over while dolphins frolicked below. Such a needed day of tranquility.
The one on the left was "last Friday night"... but we didn't dance on tabletops or take too many shots... Darn Allissa being pregnant! Not worried... she's got 10 months to make up to me. Plus I love babies and she has promised to share!
I really do have so much more to say.... and tell.... but really am trying to put it in to words. Hopefully tonight something will come together... *fingers crossed, but no promises*
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
So....
So I've been meaning to write... really and truly I have. In fact yesterday I came so close to actually posting, mind you it was with the help of some coerced dictation! But I just couldn't do it, or finish it.
Then tonight... I am all alone as it is my solo night. I make dinner, get all snuggly on the sofa and pick what I anticipate to be a wonderful love story movie. Now after 2 hours of watching these two people spend the last twenty years of their lives as friends who are never in love with one another at the same time... to finely figure it out.... and then WHAM.. she get's hit by a bus! What the heck... note to self, pick a damn comedy next time! Needless to say I cried and that was not the therapy session I was going for tonight, but it has managed to get me back to my blog and start writing.
More to come...
Saturday, December 10, 2011
My Beautiful Girls
I spent a lovely day at the beach a few weeks ago with my girls which resulted in our first holiday card. I know I am partial, but I do have beautiful daughters... just thought I'd share.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Not so little brother...
So the cutie next to me is my not so little... lil' brother. He happened to pop in the door late afternoon, just before dinner on Thanksgiving. It has been almost a year since I last saw his baby face. He is enlisted in the US Navy and has been away at school for nearly two years. The little terd-ball made me cry, apparently the reaction he was hoping to get! We had a great few days together and squeezed in another "cousins annual outing" that Friday night. Each year there is a new victim, and with me being the eldest, luckily mine has passed!
Another wonderful Thanksgiving, (with the exception of my sister being abroad) Truly amazing friends and family surround my heart.
(awesome picture by the way in the backseat of the car... NOT, but I take what I get!)
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Mr. P
For nearly a week now I have been having wonderful brief chats with Mr. P... Somehow I manage to bring him back into my world when I need some encouragement or a pat on the back. His choice of words and banter has always cheered me up. For now, he is still serving a purpose! Maybe someday we will meet again, although not sure what the connection will be at that point. He used to be so heavy in my heart, but slowly time has lightened my load, or more so survival instincts.
Keeping things brief tonight...
Keeping things brief tonight...
Monday, November 14, 2011
I wonder if I made a flip book of my life, what would be my soundtrack?
Stole this from a friend... but really, who doesn't love it!
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Interesting...
Strange, strange week I had...
First off I apparently broke up with my dear friend Jeff... the 44 yr old neighbor, whom I never started dating. We met up last Saturday night for a few drinks with some of my friends. Afterwards, we headed over to a club to watch a band preform. At some point the whole relationship topic came up and the fact that he and I were "dating", (of course with absolutely no, zero, zilch form of intimacy). I gently reminded him that we aren't dating and he needed to stop trying to put a label on us. Like I've said numerous times before, I love his company, admire his drive and personal success... but I don't want that type of a relationship with him. At that point I think he tried to kiss me, mind you some alcohol is to blame for his actions! So I had to put him in his place, which left the week a little awkward for us. I did manage to run into him at the gym one day, but he told me he needed his space and headed out of town for the weekend. Strange...
The rest of the week was fairly normal... Took the girls to get our pictures taken, which by the way have turned out great. I will be posting them as soon as I narrow the 90 options down to a sizable number! Had a great chat with Mr. P. He seems to be doing well in Seattle, which makes me happy for him, oh and he sent me a great play list of music to enjoy. Cooked at least two fabulous dinners for my dearest friends. Which by the way, I think Matt is beginning to think he has two wives! I don't mind and neither does his wife!
After my posting of drummer boy the other day, I decided to call him. We both have been so busy with our careers, but I reminded him we were supposed to still be friends! I threatened, of course in a joking manner, to delete him as a friend on Facebook... which actually wasn't to far fetched. I think I may be severing those ties in order to move on. I'm not going to lie, it's hard to see what he is doing or where he may be going and not long to be a part of it. Darn me for always remaining friends with guys, well at least the two I fell in love with! It sure was much easier with Mr. G and Mr. M!
I am sure there were a gazillion other random things that happened, but I I have finally grown tired and will be getting some sleep eye!
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Acheté mon billet à Paris ... Woohoo
I finally bought my tickets to Paris to see my sister and my future brother in law! *hehehe... not sure if he knows he is my future brother in law!** Finally something to look forward to. For now I will slowly begin to build my Paris wardrobe and get ready.
Happy!
Happy!
Monday, November 7, 2011
Drums please
http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=2626318576079
So usually I keep things pretty private on here.... but this time I am exploiting! I am trying really hard to get over this one. He was just the recipe I was waiting for. The link shows him being silly this passed weekend at a show he preformed locally. It's times like that I miss him the most. He is always so positive, optimistic and fun, not to mention a tremendous cook and a terrific father! I sure miss my little drummer boy...
So usually I keep things pretty private on here.... but this time I am exploiting! I am trying really hard to get over this one. He was just the recipe I was waiting for. The link shows him being silly this passed weekend at a show he preformed locally. It's times like that I miss him the most. He is always so positive, optimistic and fun, not to mention a tremendous cook and a terrific father! I sure miss my little drummer boy...Thursday, November 3, 2011
Dia de los muertos...
Last night we attended our 3rd annual Dia de los Muertos festival downtown. This is an event we went to with my dad a few years ago, and have now made it a tradition of remembrance. Last night was by far the best year to date. There were more altars, more vendors, plus great live music in addition to all of the folkloric dances. We finally got our faces painted in the traditional style... something we have wanted to do the last few years but the line was always too long. Not to mention the weather was perfect. All in all a great night was had by all.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Amber + 1
Apparently I was a busy blogger Friday... truthfully the servers at work were down for maintenance so I was keeping busy updating... and playing with my photo programs!
So last Tuesday I managed to buy a new car... this Tuesday I've decided to send it back, well exchange it. I wasn't even in the market for a new car. I happened to have taken mine in for service and was informed I needed new brakes, which I opted to pass on and research a bit. The next day someone from the dealership called claiming they wanted my car back. Apparently the pre-owned cars are in high demand and at the rate I'm currently driving the car is worth more to Audi now than when my lease will be up (note to self... I drive to much). Audi has a great buy back program as well as loyalty discounts so I was able to get the same car, same color with a few new added features. I loved my A4 sport... it was perfect for me. I thought it was fun, peppy to drive and made me look sexy! This new car is exactly the same except I got the quattro engine (all wheel drive), the new led lights and heated seats. All in all its a great car, however it doesn't sit as low to the ground as mine did and the wheels aren't as sporty... no big deal right. I mean c'mon, I just got a brand new car without a penny out of my pocket and my payment is pretty much the same. Also I saved $1500 since now I don't need new brakes, didn't have to make my car payment and the registration that was due is no longer my issue. Problem is... I found out Sunday night the back seats don't fold down. This is a BIG issue for me. I have three dogs and a 7 year old.... I am always folding my seats down to transport my gang. Not to mention the random pieces of furniture and accessories I am shoving in my car, I am a designer by the way! So this is a "no go" for me. I called the dealership and we are in the works to exchange my car. Who knows what I will be driving.... I am starting to regret this whole idea and really just want my old car back... it was perfect and only needed brakes!
Anyways.....
The explanation of my title.... Sunday night is the release party for the TV show. All cast has been invited to a private party to watch the final cut of the pilot... that is all cast and a guest. Problem is I don't have a plus one! I am so sick of being reminded of my lack of obtaining a plus one! I could easily ask Jeff to go with me... problem with that is he is constantly labeling us as dating and I am constantly reminding him that is not the case. If I ask him to accompany me it further justifies his argument! Don't get me wrong, I love Jeff to death... he is a great friend, always there for me... a terrific mentor, educating me and guiding me along the way... problem is he really likes me... and not in the way that I like him. So here I sit, prolonging my response to the invitation... Amber + NONE, totally bites!
Friday, October 28, 2011
Vintage Ranch Wedding...
I'm not going to lie.... this was an absolutely perfect wedding....
fall in the vineyard (sigh)
These are photos from the guests that attended Mark & Kaylin's wedding... the professional ones from the photographer have yet to come... (I can only imagine!) I was the finishing coordinator for this event, taking duties away from the bride the day before the wedding, working with the vendors and of course all of the aesthetics... Again another job I loved doing! The wedding went off with out a hitch... on time, guests all attended too, and a peaceful bride... may I say job well done!
This reinventing Amber is coming along well....
These are photos from the guests that attended Mark & Kaylin's wedding... the professional ones from the photographer have yet to come... (I can only imagine!) I was the finishing coordinator for this event, taking duties away from the bride the day before the wedding, working with the vendors and of course all of the aesthetics... Again another job I loved doing! The wedding went off with out a hitch... on time, guests all attended too, and a peaceful bride... may I say job well done!
This reinventing Amber is coming along well....
Potluck
I decided it was time to share some pics from the set design project recently completed (truth is, I have finally figured out how to play with my photo program!). I thoroughly enjoyed this segment of design. It was completely different than anything I have ever done and brought out a new level of creativity. Needless to say I loved it! Unfortunately it's not fees-able as a full time career for me at this point, but most definitely something I intend to dabble in. Hopefully I left enough of an impression to be remembered by!
Next week we have our "wrap" party and will be get to see the final release of the pilot.... fingers crossed all went well!
First pic is of course the film marker.. It lists the director as well as the director of photography. These guys were great to work with not to mention their crews were top notch. The middle pic is one of my favorite sets... This was the "stoner's" pad.... hence the haze in the room! And the last pic was of my film debut as a caterer! I have a ton more to share but not sure if I will ever get around to sharing, as I have so many other stories to tell...
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Au revoir... À bientôt
Just wanted to take a sec to say thank you to my little sister. The past few weeks went by way to fast but I loved the time we got to spend together. Fingers crossed March comes around quickly... Love ya to death... and "dang Gina"... we looked good!
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Shiny New Toy...
I love the analogy of the "shiny new toy". This phrase has been rummaging in my head these past few weeks and today I've decided to get it out! According to the Urban Dictionary, I know such a reliable source, the "shiny new toy" is "the new kid at school who gets all the attention because the kids all want to know what they're like". Eventually this "effect" wears off... but for now, I am the shiny new toy, well sorta! Allow me to elaborate... (as if I wouldn't)
A few weeks ago I attended a backyard BBQ of one of my cousins. He is a few years younger than me, however his sister is just my age. Last year he married a wonderful gal, and from time to time all of the cousins get together, in fact I think I have shared a few photos of our gang. Anyways, I am at their house in the backyard sipping wine and chatting away. The majority of the guests are young professional couples with a few little tykes running around. For the most part there were three single gals, myself, my cousin (the sister of the bday boy), and an additional girlfriend of the bride, and one single guy. Keep in mind these two girls are a part of this group, and have been since high school. Here I come as the "shiny new toy" who has only recently been around since their wedding, and my new found free time of being a single gal! I of course mingled well and talked with whomever, held a few babies, played a few games... basically I was social and didn't hide in a corner. I had intended on staying the night as it was a bit of a drive back to my place and I had the liberty of enjoying myself. At one point I had a conversation with one of the husbands as we were standing next to the stereo, mind you his wife was there the entire time!!! We were going back and forth about music and he was scanning through my iPod as it happened to be the one we were listening to at the time. I was sharing some of my favorite bands and telling him about the Gomez show I just went to with my parents. Well turns out his wife cornered my cousin in the kitchen flaming mad, apparently I was throwing myself at her husband! Umm darling, you were sitting right there... and the conversation was all about music! I happen to NOT be on the prowl for married men. Luckily my cousins' laughed it off and we continued our evening just fine. PS... the other married men were WAY cuter!
Now for the more recent event...
Monday night I joined my friends' group, (the firefighter neighbor guy... from last year) on an outing to a concert. There were a total of 14 of us limo bound to see the Foo Fighters. Again there were couples and a few of us "single" folk. All of the males were either firemen or police officers... which I came to the realization earlier this year, are NOT my type. Again I was the shiny new toy to this group and it was oh so obvious. Luckily for me I randomly ran into a couple of girl friends while waiting in line and managed to escape the group for the majority of the concert. I had consumed a few drinks but stopped early in the evening and continued with water for the rest of the night. Obviously driving wasn't an issue as we had a limo, but I did have responsibilities at home with my critters and an early morning with work. The limo ride home got interesting to say the least... this group likes to have fun, and believe me I am all for it.. but I happened to be stone cold sober and they were "saucy" drunk! I had been receiving the majority of the attention from three single guys, I was polite but also cautious to not lead anyone on. My friend... the one person I knew of the entire 14 people managed to come over and chat for a bit. We caught up on some small talk, nothing serious and again in a frickin limo with 12 other people ... and what would you know.. his girlfriend ends up crying in the corner.
Note to self... dont be the "shiny new toy"... with a bunch of drinking females!
Ladies I am not on the prowl for your man. In fact I am currently not in the market for ANY man! Focusing on myself... and being selfish doing so!
A few weeks ago I attended a backyard BBQ of one of my cousins. He is a few years younger than me, however his sister is just my age. Last year he married a wonderful gal, and from time to time all of the cousins get together, in fact I think I have shared a few photos of our gang. Anyways, I am at their house in the backyard sipping wine and chatting away. The majority of the guests are young professional couples with a few little tykes running around. For the most part there were three single gals, myself, my cousin (the sister of the bday boy), and an additional girlfriend of the bride, and one single guy. Keep in mind these two girls are a part of this group, and have been since high school. Here I come as the "shiny new toy" who has only recently been around since their wedding, and my new found free time of being a single gal! I of course mingled well and talked with whomever, held a few babies, played a few games... basically I was social and didn't hide in a corner. I had intended on staying the night as it was a bit of a drive back to my place and I had the liberty of enjoying myself. At one point I had a conversation with one of the husbands as we were standing next to the stereo, mind you his wife was there the entire time!!! We were going back and forth about music and he was scanning through my iPod as it happened to be the one we were listening to at the time. I was sharing some of my favorite bands and telling him about the Gomez show I just went to with my parents. Well turns out his wife cornered my cousin in the kitchen flaming mad, apparently I was throwing myself at her husband! Umm darling, you were sitting right there... and the conversation was all about music! I happen to NOT be on the prowl for married men. Luckily my cousins' laughed it off and we continued our evening just fine. PS... the other married men were WAY cuter!
Now for the more recent event...
Monday night I joined my friends' group, (the firefighter neighbor guy... from last year) on an outing to a concert. There were a total of 14 of us limo bound to see the Foo Fighters. Again there were couples and a few of us "single" folk. All of the males were either firemen or police officers... which I came to the realization earlier this year, are NOT my type. Again I was the shiny new toy to this group and it was oh so obvious. Luckily for me I randomly ran into a couple of girl friends while waiting in line and managed to escape the group for the majority of the concert. I had consumed a few drinks but stopped early in the evening and continued with water for the rest of the night. Obviously driving wasn't an issue as we had a limo, but I did have responsibilities at home with my critters and an early morning with work. The limo ride home got interesting to say the least... this group likes to have fun, and believe me I am all for it.. but I happened to be stone cold sober and they were "saucy" drunk! I had been receiving the majority of the attention from three single guys, I was polite but also cautious to not lead anyone on. My friend... the one person I knew of the entire 14 people managed to come over and chat for a bit. We caught up on some small talk, nothing serious and again in a frickin limo with 12 other people ... and what would you know.. his girlfriend ends up crying in the corner.
Note to self... dont be the "shiny new toy"... with a bunch of drinking females!
Ladies I am not on the prowl for your man. In fact I am currently not in the market for ANY man! Focusing on myself... and being selfish doing so!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)